I have a long history of being really hard on myself. I credit that trait for a lot of success I've had but I also credit it for a lot of heartache, too. My therapist would always tell me to be more gentle on myself. Though I sincerely thought that was great advice and it sounded really nice, I also thought it was great advice for someone else.
Because, I seriously believed that people that were gentle on themselves were just really good at giving up, letting themselves off the hook. I was proud of my iron will and knew it got me places. But, it also kept me in the same patterns.
The same patterns I'm helping all the women in my 6-Week to a Fat-Loss Lifestyle for Busy Women dispel {more info here…registration ends on Friday 10/9}. I'm not only giving these women the fundamentals of fat loss - how to eat and train to lose fat - but, we're also working on reversing negative patterns and inviting a little bit more gentleness into the process.
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If you had to count how many Mondays in your life you started a new diet or fitness plan, the plan that would finally stick and work for you once and for all, what’s your number? I conservatively went back 15 years to when I was 19 and counted one Monday a month…180 Mondays over the course of 15 years. That’s 180 times I launched a plan to lose weight and get the body I dreamed of. I’d venture to guess I had dozens more of these Monday launches prior to 19 years old as dieting and fitness plan jumping began early for me. Sounds EXHAUSTING, right?
Because, I seriously believed that people that were gentle on themselves were just really good at giving up, letting themselves off the hook. I was proud of my iron will and knew it got me places. But, it also kept me in the same patterns.
The same patterns I'm helping all the women in my 6-Week to a Fat-Loss Lifestyle for Busy Women dispel {more info here…registration ends on Friday 10/9}. I'm not only giving these women the fundamentals of fat loss - how to eat and train to lose fat - but, we're also working on reversing negative patterns and inviting a little bit more gentleness into the process.
_ _ _ _ _
If you had to count how many Mondays in your life you started a new diet or fitness plan, the plan that would finally stick and work for you once and for all, what’s your number? I conservatively went back 15 years to when I was 19 and counted one Monday a month…180 Mondays over the course of 15 years. That’s 180 times I launched a plan to lose weight and get the body I dreamed of. I’d venture to guess I had dozens more of these Monday launches prior to 19 years old as dieting and fitness plan jumping began early for me. Sounds EXHAUSTING, right?
By living with an EVERY LITTLE BIT COUNTS attitude, we can pluck ourselves out of the downward spiral after a mistake quicker and quicker. Rather than abandon my plan at the first, second or even tenth "oops" moment, I learned to hold myself accountable to the NEXT choice I had. It’s a powerful moment…almost more powerful than launching the plan in the first place.
Here some steps to honor an #ELBC attitude in your world today...
MAKE YOUR GOAL REAL
Play out your dream in your minds eye…and often. Visualize how it will feel having arrived at your dream; sauntering around 25 pounds lighter in your skinny jeans or the pride you will feel when you’re pulling yourself over the bar in an unassisted pull-up. Start each day in that positive space, before you even get out of bed. This imagery will come in handy when you are faced with the choice of slipping further after a slip-up.
SEEK PLANS THAT AREN'T PERFECT
Diets and fitness plans offer phenomenal science and rules but don’t always give you an option to customize to YOUR life; you time-constraints, your access to clean, healthy food and even your unique hormonal make-up. Work with a professional who can help you explore what's best for you and be open to further personalizing a one-sized fits all program.
-->If you're starting a weight-training program but love distance running, make time in your week for a long run if that will keep you sane.
-->If you want to follow a Paleo lifestyle but having a handful of sour patch kids every couple days will make you happy and help you make good decisions most of the time…go for it!
When we start to weave programs into our lives with some personalization like this, they start being less about someone else's rules and more about our rules for ourselves, or even our preferences.
6-Weeks to a Fat-Loss Lifestyle is the anti-perfection plan which makes change REAL and lasting. I've developed this program after years of seeking the perfect plan and failing on every single one. We win when inv
ACCEPT SLIP-UPS
Ok, so you miss a workout or fall off the tracks with one meal. You’re human and have many other things to take care of in addition to your health; your home, career, relationships, kids…life can be unpredictable and barriers come up to executing a plan to the letter. The more we accept slip-ups, the less vulnerable we are to abandoning a goal that's truly important to us.
MAKE YOUR NEXT CHOICE COUNT
This is the most important step with an Every Little Bit Counts attitude. This is where big change happens.Be gentle with yourself about your slip-up but not so gentle that you slip further off plan. Having an Every Little Bit Counts attitude doesn’t mean that you choose to slip-up. It means, you offer yourself permission once you have, to make a better choice at your next opportunity. Will your next meal be clean and on track? Will you grab a pair of dumbbells and do a 10 minute workout in your living room if you worked late and missed gym time?
FINALLY, LOG YOUR #ELBC SUCCESS
When I entered media sales years ago, one of my mentors suggested I keep a “nice emails” folder to remind me of my big wins. I loved this advice so much; I passed it on to many salespeople I managed. When in a funk after losing a deal, having a place to go to relive great wins, proved to be a great way to stay positive and push forward.
Whether it’s an email you send to yourself, a note you make in an APP on your smartphone, or a journal you keep, log your Every Little Bit Counts success - the little (or big) win you had keeping yourself on track after a slip-up. By noting our wins, we can create a powerful toolbox for ourselves, a history of tried and true ways we recovered after a set-back, making it easier and easier to trust ourselves and stay on track towards our goals.
6-Weeks to a Fat-Loss Lifestyle for Busy Women starts on Monday, October 12th - registration is now open and closes on this Friday at midnight. I'll show you how to combine discipline with self-compassion so that you begin to live a fat-loss lifestyle you can enjoy and sustain. LEARN MORE & SIGN UP HERE.
I've studied fitness my whole life because I truly love it but, I've always struggled settling into eating healthy consistently…finding a status quo between being completely ON or completely OFF a diet. I would label myself at any time as being "good" or "bad" and my friends and family became accustomed to either be getting together with a disciplined Jess or an indulgent Jess. Diets would end one of two ways; I'd sacrifice so much for so long, I felt I deserve an indulgence, or I'd go against the rules of the plan and check out for lack of perfect execution.
After a slip-up, rather than throw myself a little self-compassion OR give myself a swift kick in the butt...I gave up. I figured if I was going to mess up, I'd MEEEEES UP! So, after battling my willpower and ordering a carb lovers meal at a restaurant, I’d enjoy some candy at the further expense of the hard work I had already put in. Then, I’d skip the gym the next morning because, who wants to work out when you feel bloated and have low energy? The downward spiral is so easy and the whole time, I'd engage in a mental battle, wondering why I couldn't remember the gung-ho Jess that launched the plan (my full willpower in tact).
Kelly McGonigle, Stanford psychologist and author of “The Willpower Instinct”, calls this throwing up of your hands once you've lost willpower, the “What the Hell!” effect. You eat a cookie that isn't allowed on your diet and you decide that since you've messed up, you might as well eat the whole bag and screw up royally.
I came to realize that there is no such thing as perfect execution of a diet…at least any diet I want to be on anymore. The quest of perfection is what keeps many of us from success time and time again. We WILL mess up. We WILL have set backs. Because life happens. Everything changed for me, when I started to play around with backing up a not so stellar choice with a great one. Why? Because every little bit counts.
After a slip-up, rather than throw myself a little self-compassion OR give myself a swift kick in the butt...I gave up. I figured if I was going to mess up, I'd MEEEEES UP! So, after battling my willpower and ordering a carb lovers meal at a restaurant, I’d enjoy some candy at the further expense of the hard work I had already put in. Then, I’d skip the gym the next morning because, who wants to work out when you feel bloated and have low energy? The downward spiral is so easy and the whole time, I'd engage in a mental battle, wondering why I couldn't remember the gung-ho Jess that launched the plan (my full willpower in tact).
Kelly McGonigle, Stanford psychologist and author of “The Willpower Instinct”, calls this throwing up of your hands once you've lost willpower, the “What the Hell!” effect. You eat a cookie that isn't allowed on your diet and you decide that since you've messed up, you might as well eat the whole bag and screw up royally.
I came to realize that there is no such thing as perfect execution of a diet…at least any diet I want to be on anymore. The quest of perfection is what keeps many of us from success time and time again. We WILL mess up. We WILL have set backs. Because life happens. Everything changed for me, when I started to play around with backing up a not so stellar choice with a great one. Why? Because every little bit counts.
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