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8/30/2016

Your Body Is Not A Topic of Conversation | Jessica Oar | Be PowerFULL | Fitness and Nutrition Coach | South Shore MA

This past weekend, I was out to a nice dinner with a bunch of friends. As we settled in at our table, our server, a woman, came over to take our drink order and when she walked away, a lively debate ensued.

See, she was stunningly gorgeous. Tanned skin, bright eyes, long dark hair and a black tank top on revealing her cut, muscular arms, chest and shoulders. She was adorned in some places with gold temporary tattoos.

It was obvious that she is an athlete and lifts weights regularly. As someone who values building muscle, I admired her traps, delts and forearms. As I personally work hard to build muscle, I absolutely love seeing women rock strong bodies. We all admired her and the men olged a bit and voiced their intimidation.

There we sat, all of us, talking about her body.

Each time she came to the table and left, the conversation would come back to her physique. "Is she a body builder?", "A power lifter?", "A physique competitor?", "She could beat me up!", "She could beat you up!", "Man, she looks strong!".

Overall, the tone of the conversation was one of awe and admiration. But, I still couldn't shake that it was none of our business anyway, no matter if what we felt about her body was positive or negative. We could feel that she was the most attractive or unattractive person on this earth, but it's still none of our business to judge her physique, let alone TELL HER how we feel about HER body.

Do we have the right to comment on her body because it's clear that she may work hard at it?

Are we obligated to say something just because we notice it?

Do we even know how SHE feels about her body? Would a compliment be well received or would our seemingly harmless comments about her body cause her damage in some way?

The opinions varied around the table; someone thought that she may work hard and be thrilled to talk about her training, while someone else thought she'd be might be embarrassed and feel put on the spot, and someone else thought that NOT saying something might actually be worse.

We finally arrived at the fact that her physique is not an elephant in the room that must be addressed.

Just because she is wearing clothes that happen to show her muscular physique, she is not displaying her body for public opinion or feedback. She's simply wearing a tank top, on a hot night, to do her job. The fact that she has temporary tattoos adorning on her chest and bicep still don't give us the right to comment on her physique. Her body is not up for public interpretation. All that matters is how she chooses to think and talk about her body.

The women around the table couldn't help but bring up the true elephant in the room. What if our server that night was a man who was impressively built? Would our boyfriends and husbands agree that his physique was something that needed to be talked about, validated and complimented just the same as our female waitress. Would it have been such a lively discussion?

I want to be clear, this isn't an attack on our partners. To a degree, women owning their ability to be more and not less, to build muscle and not obsess over being skinny and lean like the headlines want us to...it's a relatively new movement (but it's gaining momentum!). This conversation is more about the fact that regardless of what we do with our bodies, no matter how hard (or not) that we work, the only opinion of our body that matters is ours.

Our physiques are not up for comment.

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GO BE YOURSELF.

8/25/2016

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I'm about to drop a major truth bomb on you. Ready?

Stop trying to be like everyone else. It's YOU that will make you successful.

As a solo-preneur (in charge of myself and myself only with my business) I can find at times that my biggest opportunity, working for myself, can also be my biggest obstacle.

See, if I wanted to, I could spend HOURS consuming my peers work. Studying, admiring...and at many times, comparing and feeling less than because of how completely bad-ass a lot of their products and messages are. What at times is exciting, empowering and motivating can turn debilitating, can steal from my peace and wreck havoc on my spark.

"He said that better than I could!"

"How will I ever get to where she is?"

"I don't have his experience!"

"She's fitter than I am!"

"Omg, she's a killer writer!" ... "A better lifter!" ... "A more gifted x, y, z..."

We could do this for days, right? If you think I'm wrong, just notice how you feel next time you're scrolling through your social media feed. We can all get stuck in this comparison trap. And, too often.

In my former career, I was a Sales Manager of a major radio station. I was responsible for hiring new sales talent and then training and developing him/her into a high-performing advertising salesperson.

One piece of advice I always gave my new hires was this: "Find someone successful you respect on our team, in our building, and build a relationship with them".

Why did I give this advice? Well, despite the obvious - that rolling in a successful crowd helps you to level up (and commiserating with the unsuccessful crowd does quite the opposite) - I hoped my newbie would study and emulate the behaviors of their new mentor, noticing the things they consistently did and said that made them successful.

BUT.

There's an essential caveat to this advice and for a bit of time during my first year as a solo-preneur, I conveniently forgot it. By all means, study, research and dissect but then....

Go be yourself.

No one makes people feel at ease in conversations like you. Or, laughs at just the right times like you. Or, writes emails like the reader is in a conversation with a best friend they haven't even met yet, like you. No one explains things like you, has the same personal experience as you...has your background, your quirks, your education. No one knows how to make people feel special, included and a part of something big like you. No one has your strength, your resolve, your thick skin. No one has your competitive spirit, your drive, your courage. Use it, use all of it, to do something big, something you can't even picture right now.

I'm in awe with how much my work with Be PowerFULL comes back to this practice of authenticity, both for myself and my clients. How showing up just as we are is the truest way to drive our success long term. How authenticity is the answer to just about every struggle we're encountering and how showing up exactly as we are levels up our relationships, spirituality, business and health.

Of course, this doesn't mean that we can't evolve, grow and change into a new, improved versions of ourselves every day. Lord knows, I'm not the same person as I was 10 years ago. And frankly, I'd be sad if I was. So many life experiences have shaped me into the new, improved Jess that I am today.

And, trying to be anyone but myself is not only a disservice to myself but those I intend to help.

Go be yourself, the world thanks you.

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DO YOU EVEN HAVE FUN WHEN YOU RUN?

8/16/2016

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Spoiler: I don't.

I'm not a long-distance runner. I think I've always known this but I never really owned it. For much of my athletic life, I've pushed this form of exercise on myself without really stopping to ask, "Do I actually enjoy this?".

I have always much preferred sprinting short distances to long duration running. As a young athlete, I was pretty darn quick and that explosive power served me well in swimming, soccer, track and lacrosse. In fact, before I knew anything about efficient exercise, I made up my own intense workouts on the street I grew up on. I'd head outside after dark, often to deal with the typical teen angst on days my parents were "the worst", and I'd sprint from one telephone pole to the next, then walk until the next one, sprint again, and so on for about 20 minutes of heart-and-arm pumping exercise.

Ironically though, for most of my 20's, I felt like I needed to run moderate-long distances to stay in shape and looked like I worked out.

The kicker is, I never did get the tight, toned look I wanted. Sure, there were times where I'd follow a restrictive diet and lose 15-20 lbs and appear slimmer, but I wasn't actually working on building, or maintaining, muscle (one of the most important components to metabolism boosting and physique change).

As a long-time athlete, running certainly had it's rewards. I enjoyed pushing myself, seeing progress from consistency and competition, but if I'm honest, I spent more of my time dealing with nagging injuries and procrastinating my workouts than actually enjoying the runs.

Longer distance, moderate-intensity running isn't for everyone. It certainly isn't for me.

Yet, time and time again, I have new clients coming through my doors saying that they feel the same way, but they still do it to get their "cardio".

Long duration cardio has long been heralded as the number one method to burn calories and lose weight. But believing that cardio is the only way to burn calories effectively for physique change is the OLD way of thinking.

I'm psyched to be a part of a community of female trainers who are talking about SO MANY different types of training that can improve our metabolism, get the physique results we want, but more importantly, have a hell of a lot of fun doing it.

To be clear, this is not a hate letter to long-distance running. Not in the least. I work with many women every day who absolutely love this to be a part of their fitness, they are runners through and through and I'm so happy to work with them on rounding out their training.

But if you truly don't have fun when you run (long distance), go ahead and try this highly popular short and sweet track workout (taken from Busy But Burnin', the 6-week fitness & fat loss coaching group!).

For more short and sweet workouts like this, join my Be PowerFULL community to get my free newsletters in your inbox each week!

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TRICKS FOR GETTING IN MORE VEGGIES.

8/3/2016

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For much of my 20's, I would purchase a large bulk of veggies from the store each week....and then I would transfer those once beautiful, then slimy, veggies into the garbage can a week and a half to two weeks later. LIKE CLOCKWORK.

Poor veggies, such good intentions...such poor follow-through.

Ok so, I didn't ignore every veggie I purchased, but I was a busy career woman and by the time I got home from work most nights, there was no chance I'd have the energy to cook the swiss chard or broccoli rabe waiting for me in my refrigerator.

My breakfasts were eaten on the run, a protein bar (I lived on Think Thin bars for years!) or an egg sandwich, lunches were left to chance based on where client's wanted to lunch that day and dinners were scavenged from the easiest put together thing from the pantry/fridge. I'd get one, maybe two, servings of veggies each day. Yet, I was always on a diet. Always searching for the perfect combination, or rather restriction, of foods so I could drop the perpetual 15 lbs that needed to be shed.

I overlooked one of the simplest ways to level up my nutrition and take control of my metabolism. In fact, after working with dozens and dozens of women on dialing in their nutrition for weight loss, I've found that the singular focus on drastically increasing vegetable intake has had the largest impact on weight loss goals.

Vegetables, in fact, should be more than half of the total food volume of one's fat-loss diet. More than HALF. Yet, the Average American consumes less than 2 cups of fruits and veggies EACH DAY. When we are on the run, we seek the quickest, easiest food options...options that tend to be high in starch, sugar and fat. And, many of the healthier convenience options are fruit heavy...think smoothies and yogurts. Fruits, though delicious and nutritious, tend to be starchier (higher sugar) fiber options than vegetables.

Why does a higher veggie intake make such a big impact on my client's weight loss goals?
1. They feel more satisfied when their meal is over because fiber is filling.
2. Since fiber is digested slowly, it helps them to feel fuller for longer; curbing hunger and cravings that derail many diets (along with
3. They can eat more food! I know for myself in particular, I value snacks where I can eat higher volume, rather than portioning out 8 almonds to "enjoy".
4. The best part? By increasing your vegetable intake, you're reprogramming your mind to eat *more* food, rather than less, like every.other.diet.you've.ever.tried.

Here are my top 5 tricks to increasing your vegetable intake:

1. Pop them into smoothies.
Spinach and kale are great for this! Pop a handful or two in your favorite smoothie recipe for an added vitamin and mineral punch (Vitamins A and K, folate and calcium to name a few). If you have a smoothie for breakfast; BOOM, 1-2 servings of veggies down for the day!

2. Prepare them in bulk at the beginning of the week.
I like to buy a variety of root veggies each week like carrots, parsnips, sweet potatoes, beets, onions, etc. I wash them and chop them (potatoes with skin on) and roast (along with other veggies like broccoli, asparagus, brussels sprouts and squashes) so that I have them on hand for the whole week. Most weeks, I do about two full trays on a Sunday evening. I'll either warm the leftovers to have on the side of a protein for dinner, throw into the pan with eggs in the am, or top on a salad for lunch. To roast, simply chop in even pieces and lay out on sheet pans. Toss with extra virgin olive oil or avocado oil, season with salt and pepper and roast on 425 for 30 minutes, tossing occasionally until browned.

3. Commit to one big salad every single day.
By committing to one big salad every day, you'll be getting a few servings of veggies all in one meal. Pile on veggies like tomato and cucumber, or a nice mild sliced Cubanelle pepper on top of pre-washed mixed greens with a piece of grilled chicken, for a super simple and quick meal packed with micronutrients! If this is the one meal that goes right in your day, you've had at 3-4 servings of veggies all in one sitting.

*Make salads interesting! I share this tip often in my fat-loss coaching groups because it's key for when salads feel boring and the leftover pizza in the break room or in the fridge starts calling my name. Every week during your grocery haul, grab a container of marinated olives, peppers, etc. and layer on top of your salads, along with a bit of cheese, for an extra flavor punch!

Big Ass Salad | Jessica Oar | Fitness and Nutrition Coach | South Shore MA

4. Be a saute (or broil) master.
The thought of steaming my veggies makes me want to run in another direction. For this reason, I prefer sautéing my veggies so that I actually WANT to eat them. The quick sauté veggies that I like are; mushrooms, spinach, kale, beet greens, swiss chard, mustard greens - those typically cook down pretty fast in a pan on med heat with avocado oil or evoo and a little salt and pepper. More heftier veggies like broccoli, broccoli-rabe, broccolini, brussels sprouts, cauliflower, green beans can be steamed for 5 minutes (either in a basket or right in the pan with a thin layer of chicken stock, covered until soft) and then sautéed with some oil, salt and pepper for a good finishing sear and flavoring. Sometimes, I prefer to pop veggies under the broiler in the oven (which I dubbed 'city grilling' when we lived in Boston and couldn't use a grill) to cook them quickly as a side for a meal, just watch because they cook fast and need to be turned.

5. Pre-portion veggie snack bags.
Keep it simple! Celery stalks, baby carrots, sliced peppers, cucumber...choose your favorite veggies and chop them up at the beginning of the week, putting them into serving size ziplock bags to take on the go. Once chopped, some veggies like peppers will give off a bit of moisture so simply pop a paper towel in the bag to avoid soggy veggies.

6. Buy a high-quality vegetable powder.
Some people struggle to find vegetables they actually enjoy eating. If this is the case for you, or if you battle to find time to prepare the recommended 9 servings of vegetables each day, this one's for you. Buy a high-quality vegetable powder like this one that I use daily, on the recommendation of my friend, Kim Shaper. This brand has the antioxidant equivalent of 24 servings of fruits and vegetables in just one serving! I will either add to a smoothie or drink blended into a 12-oz glass of water.

So, c'mon...

Eat Your Veggies Bitch Tank Top | Jessica Oar | Fitness and Nutrition Coach | South Shore MA

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